m - 23 july 2001(2)
From: Michele
Sent: Monday, July 23, 2001 4:08 PM
Subject: Oh! So that’s why I didn’t get an e-mail for Friday!
Hi Anne!
Hopefully you got the Friday e-mail that I re-sent to you. I don’t know what the heck happened to it. I didn’t get a "failure of delivery" notification. I don’t know if there is a dead e-mail office. If you didn’t get it- I might as well tell you what you should mark your calendar for: The Mummy Returns is being released on video on October 2! (the original e-mail says October 6th but I’ve since learned they pushed the date up a bit).
I worked all weekend. The July ornament premiere turned out pretty well. We made $1000 less this year than we did last year. Mary and I were talking and we think the owners are having fianical problems. If worse came to worse and the store did close, I guess I’ll just have to find another job. The only thing I would miss is my co-workers. I can’t honestly see myself staying at this job forever. I’ve matured so much over the past several years. I stayed at ***** for five years because I was afraid to move on, I was afraid that somewhere new would be too overwhelming for me. I only quit because we moved and I had to find another job. I thank God for that. Now my attitude is that if I could of worked at ***** and at *****, I can work anywhere!
Anyway, I’m off today and tomorrow. I’m going to relax!! There is so much I need to do (write, clean, read this-that) and I always promise myself "as soon as I get a day off work, I’m going to do all that I need to do", but when I’m off work, all I want to do is sit in front of the tv (or the computer) and veg out! I get so angry at myself for being so lazy sometimes. I’m the type of person that if I’m doing nothing, I feel like a nothing.
Good luck on your final exam! What subject is it in? Also good luck on that class you’re going to re-take. That reminds me of my US History class I had in tenth grade. For the life of me, I couldn’t pass the tests, which counted a huge part of our final grade. So, I admit that I cheated on a few of the tests, just to pass with a low C! Gosh, I wish I could go back in time and have the brain then that I do now. I mean, I’m not this genius but a 28 year old mind in a 15 … 16 year old mind, my grades would have been a lot higher! It wasn’t that my grades were that bad, but I probably didn’t live up to my potential.
Thanks for asking me about my book. I admit that I really haven’t been working on it. I mean, I know a couple publishing companies I’d like to try, and I know what I have to do and everything, its just a matter of taking that first step. Sometimes I get so scared. Sometimes I wonder if this is what God really wants me to do. I mean, I know as a writer, what I’ll be getting myself into and I wonder if i’m ready for it. I don’t dare utter what I’m saying to you to my family. They would be so disappointed in me if they knew what I was feeling. But I want to write! I don’t know what’s stopping me. I suppose I’m so scared of failure as much as I’m scared of success. Its like right now I’m standing on the diving board, and I know once I jump off of it, there is no turning back and I’m gonna get wet. But will I sink? Or will I swim?
I’ve just been feeling really down lately. Lonely. You know guy-loney. Sometimes I wonder if its me who has the problem. I mean, here I am 28-years-old and I really don’t even know how to talk to guys. I get all uncomfortable around men and I can’t think of a thing to say. And in turn I know I must be giving off bad "vibes" in the process. Yesterday I was helping a guy with the computer (we print out invitations and announcements) and he was good looking and pretty nice and I acting like a blabbering idiot! I couldn’t even look him in the eye! What the hell is wrong with me?
I’m sorry for boring you with my problems. It just feels really good to talk to someone. Maybe I’m just having a bad day. I’m usually pretty confidant in myself. I try not to worry about this too much and totally trust God, but it’s difficult sometimes. I just wish I could just let go and let God take total control over my (love) life!
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Questions answered
what to I do with extra money?- I usually save some and spend some. (I’m practical but I’m not boring!)
Do I think I could dress and act like someone completely opposite from myself for a few days?- I think I could but it would have to be in an unfamiliar place and unfamiliar people (i.e.- when I’m on vacation). I think I would feel too self-conscious if I did this in familiar surroundings.
if i could live at another time in history when would it be or would I choose the present- I too am a fan of modern conviences but I would love to live a few weeks in medeival times. Maybe i can find myself a dashing knight in shining armour who will sweep me off my feet and I can bring him back here to 2001.
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movie- The Fugitive
tv show- Saved By The Bell
cd- the Time-Life Sounds Of The 80’s collection.
funny scene- in an episode of The Honeymooners, Ralph thinks that Alice is having an affair with a man named Harvey. He follows her to where Harvey lives. He busts into the apartment and while Alice tells Ralph that he’s mistaken, he looks at the closed bedroom door and yells "Come out of there, Harvey!" the door opens and a little boy walks out, sleepily rubbing his eyes. Turns out Alice was babysitting and as usual, Ralph puts his foot in his mouth again.
I’m not going to post any questions of my own today, since you’ll answer Friday’s questions. That is, if you got the e-mail!
Till next time, take care and God bless!
Michele
