m - 21 october 2001
From: Michele
Sent: Sunday, October 21, 2001 6:28 PM
Subject: I need a hug! :*(
Hi Anne!
Should I start with the good news or the bad news. Well, I’ll get the yucky stuff out of the way first. You know, like swallowing a spoonful of nasty tasting cough medicne really fast.
Friday morning when I came into work, Nora said to me, "Will you come in the back? I need to talk to you." So I did, completely oblivious to what was about to happen. Now, since this happened two days ago, I can’t remember exactly word for word what was said so I’ll try my best. Nora said that she was still upset over what happened Tuesday (you know how I didn’t get finished with the ornaments and Kristin and Shelly only priced the Glass Baron ….) and she said to me "You couldn’t have worked on those ornaments for more than half an hour." I said, "I worked on them until at least 7" (which was about three hours) and Nora said, "No you didn’t." Anne, I don’t know about you, but when I know I’m right about something and someone argues with me about it, I get so upset I can barely speak! Well, that’s what happened. I just started crying and once I start, I can’t stop! Oh, wait, the fun doesn’t stop there! Then she proceeded to tell me how I do the least amount of work out of everyone there! Well, with the exception of Wendy. She said, "Even Audrey does more work than you." Let me tell you about Audrey. She’s been there for at least two months and she still doesn’t know what the hell she’s doing on the registers! Our figures have been off for the longest time because of her! So here I am crying and weakly saying, "Yes, I do do my work!" And Nora says, "No you don’t. Look at how hard everyone else works. ANd it isn’t fair that they have to do all the work. Look at Mary. Look at how much she gets done." Well, Mary is Nora’s "pet" and whatever she does is gold in Nora’s eyes. Anne, I BUST MY ASS there! You don’t know how many times I’ve nearly made myself sick worrying about that stupid store and getting things done! ANd the final insult to injury, Nora wrote me up and told me "If you’re not going to do your work, I’m going to have to find someone else who will." I can’t believe I came thisclose to losing my job! I mean, what the fu*$?! It took everything I could not to grab my purse and walk right out of there and never come back! And why the piss did she do that to me ten minutes before the store opened? Did she really think I would want to deal with customers then? It took awhile for me to calm down. It just got to the point that I was so exhausted from crying and my body had enough. Needless to say, I didn’t talk to Nora much for the rest of the day. I just talked to her when I had to, when it was work related. I didn’t "chat" with her like I usually do. When I got home, I bravely wrote her an e-mail. I saved it. I’ll send it to you so you can read what I wrote. I haven’t seen her yet since I wrote it. I will on Tuesday. I’m a little nervous, but I dont think I said anything wrong!
Frankly, Anne, maybe this is a blessing in disguise. Maybe this is God’s way of telling me that it’s time to move on. Not now, I would like to work out the year, but I honestly don’t see myself there this time next year. I’ve thought a few times about trying to get a job at the bank. I’m pretty good with money and it just seems like a nice change of pace from retail. I’m still trying to understand what happened on Friday. I’m not only angry at Nora, I’m also angry at myself for not defending myself. For blubbering like an idiot! It’s just that when I’m put on the spot like that, I can’t think of anything to say! Oh, I can think of a comeback …. two days later!
I told some of my co-workers about it: Shelly, Kristin, and Ed and they were all flabbergasted. Ed said, "Well, for what it’s worth, I think you’re doing an excellent job." And Kristin said, "She doesn’t know what she’s talking about." Shelly said, "You do more work than most of the people here!" I feel a lot better. Nora was in the wrong. When I told Ed and Kristin about it (that’s who I worked with today) they both said that Nora was clearly not herself and that’s true. Nora usually isn’t like that. Ed said that maybe it’s the fact that she has all those physical problems and she’s more irrritable than usual. Well, I’m sorry that Nora is sick, but she had no right to take it out on me! I will try to forgive and forget this, but if it happens again, I will quit sooner than later. I am not someone’s punching bag.
Anne, will you say a prayer for me reguarding this situation? I would really appreciate it!
YES, DISNEYWORLD IS LOOKING BETTER AND BETTER!!!
Mark your calander! November 7th will be our six month anniversary! Yep, on May 7th you sent your first e-mail to me! I wonder if there is such a thing as a Friendship anniversary?
Brain (Danielles boyfriend) bought me a little stuffed Sylvester (Loony Tunes) on Friday to cheer me up. He stressed, "Now don’t think I’m flirting with you!" Wasn’t that sweet of him? I’m getting better and better to the fact that my YOUNGER sister has found someone before I did.
One more thing about what happened on Friday: If I really was let go, I have to think that if that was the worst possible thing that could happen in my life, it wouldn’t be so bad. I have God, my health , my imagination and my family to support me. And another job will eventully come about.
Oh yeah! Went to the Jo Dee Messina concert last night. Well, you know by that e-mail I sent. It was so awsome!
Oh my gosh Nora is like your boss! She is never wrong, and she will always have something changed after I’m finished doing something! I swear, are we living in a paralell universe or what?!
Just think if IM-HOT-tep was my lover and he defended my honor! A wicked grin curls on my lips as I think of him going into ***** and all hell breaking loose! Why does it seem that things wouldn’t be so bad if we had a significant other in our lives?
An inventory job would be perfect fo me. I also am not a people person. And I do take comments way too personally (duh- what happened on Friday). What kind of store is Parisian? I never heard of it! I’ve often wondered in huge stores when they close at night, how do they know all the customers are gone. I mean, it’s easy at a place like *****, but what about a store with like 20 or more aisles? I don’t know, I just think about stupid things like that.
Dr. Tutanji doesn’t sound too shabby! Dirty darn darn that he has to be married, huh? Are you self concious when you talk to him? I can’t believe how stupid I act around men I have crushes on. I’ll giggle and stammer and trip over things and drop things. Please tell me that you do the same thing! I feel like such a freak sometimes about my lack of experience with the opposite sex!
Anne, please don’t be so hard on yourself about your physical activity with your past boyfriends. At least you didn’t have sex, and I’m sure there were times you could have. God has forgiven you. You just need to forgive yourself! You are wiser now, and I know you won’t put youself in tempting situations. "Oh, Mr. Vosloo, you want me to go into your bedroom with you in this house we are in by ourselves and you have your shirt off and you want us both to sit on the bed but you promise you won’t try anything? Sure, I trust you! I trust myself! I can tell my raging hormones to calm down!" ….yeah, sure! (giggle)
Ok, I’m going to say something and I don’t know if it’s something. It probably isn’t anything but you never know….
A couple months ago when I was taking a walk, this guy was jogging and he ran past me in the opposite direction. He wasn’t a bad looking guy. He had really short dark brown hair and he wore glasses and he was built pretty nice. Anyway, he smiled at me and said "hi". It was almost as if he knew me. I said "hi" back and I continued walking I was racking my brain trying to figure out when or if I ever saw him before. I just assumed that he was just a friendly guy.
So yesterday when I was walking home from work, I walked past this guy who was walking his dog. I swear it was the same guy who I saw two months ago. Once again he smiled and said hi. Me, not being a people person, usually criges when I have to walk past people and say "hello" but with this guy I didn’t feel that way. Even when I saw him in the distance, before I could figure out who it was, I felt really calm.
I know this probably is nothing … but what if it isn’t? I mean, what if this guy is my soul mate? From what I saw, I am attracted to him. He has a very nice smile. it just seems like he’s a really nice guy. But how can I tell by a smile and a hello? Well if he is my soul mate, I hope God will speed things up a little! What am I going to do- say "hello" to him every two months for a year straight before something happens? (lol). Well, it’s always fun to imagine.
Well, that’s about it for now. I hope you had a good weekend. Take care and God bless! God bless the USA!
Michele
At the end of the concert Jo Dee said "When you leave tonight, I want you to take two things with you. First, You have to love yourself first and second always try to be kind to everyone." The second one is more difficult but wouldn’t it be a wonderful world if everyone lived by that?
